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Let's start protecting our Black families!


In episode 041 of the Naked Proverbs podcast, Rich and Nik Scott discuss the importance of protecting your family with life insurance, a final will and testament and trusts.



Nik:

Welcome back to the Naked Proverbs podcast where we unclothe the truth about Black love family and marriage. My name is Nik Scott, one of your hosts, and I'm here with my husband.

Rich:

What's going on? Is your boy Rich. And today, we're gonna talk about them family matters.

Nik:

Right at the start of every episode, we always remind you that we are not trained, licensed, professional therapists or counselors. We have been married a long time. And we use Naked Proverbs our platform to share our advice, our opinions, our experience and our stories. If you haven't already, make sure you're following the Naked Proverbs on whatever podcasting platform you listen on. And if you like what you hear, make sure you show us your love and support by giving us a five-star review on iTunes.

Rich:

As always, we'd love to take a moment and say thank you to all of our listeners that have tuned in. We are on, I don't know, like Episode 41, 42? Somewhere in there. So, this has been going on for a while, and y'all are hanging in there with us. And we appreciate that.

Rich:

Okay, so basically, on Friday, past Vice President Joe Biden made a comment. And the media is running with it. Social media, it's on everything. I mean, it's two days later, and we're still talking about it, right? But just in case you don't know what we're talking about, maybe you have been on an island, or you just are not turning on the news because you sick of all the negative. Past Vice President Joe Biden, the potential democratic nomination to run for president in the fall, made a comment while he was on The Breakfast Club? Long story short, he basically say, look, if you don't vote for me, then you ain't Black.

Nik:

That's what he said. And I'm not one that really pays attention to politics. And I know that all the quote unquote, wokest Black folks, we're all into politics, but I'm not into politics. And I would consider myself to be pretty woke. And I have my reasons not to be into politics. So, I wasn't even aware of the comment that had been made. And not only am I not into politics, but I'm not into pop culture like that. So, I don't listen to The Breakfast Club. But I did go ahead and listen to this because it has been such a hot topic on social media and on the media. And I listened to just a clip of what he said, and he was out of line. To me it really emphasizes the fact or emphasizes the opinion that Democrats don't have to work for the Black vote. It's almost like if you're Black, then you're automatically going to vote for the Democrats. And that's not necessarily true.

Rich:

And I know some people are not gonna like what I'm about to say, but believe me today, I do not give two shits. Here's the reality, whether you talking about President Trump, President Joe Biden, they are two men of the same coin, just different sides. There is nothing that really shines about either of them to me. Neither of them care about my issues. You know, you have people that defend Trump and say, well, he did, but he did this. But then you have Biden has done some of the exact same things. And you have those same people that are jumping on board, like Biden is the next coming of Christ. So, to me, it's one of those Freudian slips. He can say he was joking. That's probably you know what,

Nik:

That's probably what he said.

Rich:

And he's already probably said it. Because I haven't tuned back in because I really didn't care. Once I heard it...

Rich:

Look, this is what I've learned in life. People say what they mean the first time. The second, third, fourth, fifth time when they come back, talk about oops, and they get caught. That's nothing more than them trying to solve what they've messed up. So, like I said, at the end of the day, it is what it is. I don't think it's defendable. I don't think that anybody should be giving him a pass for his comments. And I think that he needs to show the community that you know what I do think more of you and this is why.

Nik:

That's the bigger part of this to me. We see these two white men that are running for president and you're right, it is basically the lesser of two evils like it always is. But it's almost like politics is turned into this

Rich:

Game show.

Nik:

This circus, not even a game show. It's like a circus. It's almost like we have Joe Biden here on The Breakfast Club with a Black man who's obviously concerned about Black issues and he was asking pretty serious questions during the interview. And Joe Biden's on the other side of the fence, you know, all cocky like, yeah, I'm on here because I know that, you know, you're endorsing me, you're gonna vote for me, you're gonna do this, but during the interview, he says we are looking at several Black women. But why are you looking at Black women? Is it because you want to give this picture of yes, I support Black people and Black women matter? Or, is it because this is just a strategy? Like to me politics is just, it's not about the people like you just said. It is not about me. It's not about you. And what makes it even worse is we have people loudly and blatantly in the community, on Twitter, on social media, defending what he said.

Rich:

Two sides to the same coin.

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Rich:

In the beginning, I stated that we're going to talk about family matters, right? What I'm talking about are those matters, those things that should matter to the family, that we often don't talk about. We often kind of push to the side. Those things that can really change a family's trajectory in life and can add real value in future if they are actually addressed and you take care of them.

Nik:

We've kind of touched on this topic several times throughout the history of the 41 episodes on our podcast, and we never really have dedicated a full podcast to this and we're dedicating a full podcast to it because it is so important. It is so important for our community, our mothers, our fathers, our husbands, our wives, to understand the tools that you can access in order to help change your family's future.

Rich:

I'm gonna start off with one that I think is very important and it's so often overlooked. And that is life insurance. You know, I am so sick of, and it's not just our community, but I am so sick of seeing GoFundMes, and these crowdsourcing page when someone passes away. Let me tell you something. We're all gonna die. Prepare for it. Let's stop acting like well, it's never gonna happen to me, Well, I'm gonna be old when it happens. Well, it's not my problem. Because while it may not be your problem, it is a problem for your family when you die without life insurance. And you know, I know that there are people that will say, well, it's expensive. You know what I Googled real quick. The average funeral cost is anywhere between $10,000 and $15,000. Now, can it be more? Of course, it can. Can it be less? Yes, it can. But on average, you're looking at between 10 and $15,000 to have a burial ceremony and have your body placed in the ground.

Nik:

That's a lot of money.

Rich:

It's a lot of money. But do you know how much it costs to get 10 to $15,000 of life insurance?

Nik:

How much does it cost?

Rich:

Between $15 and $20 per month. So, that saying, you know what, we're not going to go to Starbucks for two days. That saying we're not going to order one pizza this month.

Nik:

Wait, you said $15 to $20 per month?

Rich:

Per month.

Nik:

Okay.

Rich:

And that's per person. Because that's the other thing. You may have life insurance through your job. You may have life insurance, you know, through some policy, but do you have life insurance for your children? Do you have life insurance for every single person that lives under your roof?

Nik:

Okay, my mind was just blown. Fifteen to $20 per month. Per month, y'all. If you're listening to this podcast, that means that you have some type of device that can get on the internet or a cell phone or something like that. Everybody, in my opinion listening to this podcast right now, I really don't know much about y'all's finances and your demographics like that, but I guarantee that everyone listening to this podcast can allocate $15 to $20 per month to life insurance.

Rich:

We're basically saying $180 to $240 a year.

Nik:

Yeah.

Rich:

That's what it comes out to.

Nik:

That is a small amount of money. And let's be clear, I don't know how people feel when someone passes, and they have to go on to Facebook and Twitter and Instagram and all these other places and beg strangers for money. Beg strangers for money, right? We're talking about planning your family's future and family matters. What type of perception, reputation, image are you putting out there when you're out begging people for money to pay for whoever's funeral.

Rich:

You are not going to be the beneficiary of your life insurance policy. That is just a fact. But you should care about those around you enough that they are not out there panhandling, begging, paupers, you know? They should, they shouldn't be standing out here on the corner saying can you pay for my mom's funeral? Can you pay for my child's funeral? Can you pay for my spouse's funeral? Because it really isn't that much. But we just don't make it a priority in our community.

Nik:

Yeah.

Rich:

We don't. We will talk about everything. And everybody always talks about well you'll buy the newest Jordans. And that's not always true.

Nik:

Yeah.

Rich:

You know, but I would bet that 99% of the people that are listening to this podcast have a cell phone.

Nik:

Oh, yeah, I would say 100%

Rich:

That, that in and of itself says that you have $15 to $20 a month.

Nik:

Yeah.

Rich:

You do.

Nik:

Well, for me, it's so important because I feel like it's about that legacy, right? I feel like we as parents, and if you don't have children, then this part doesn't necessarily apply to you. But, we as parents, we hopefully are wanting to set our kids up to be in a position that's far better off when they start, than when we started. And insurance is one guaranteed way to do that. It's guaranteed. It doesn't matter where you started, right? But if you have that life insurance and these other documents in place, you're guaranteeing that your kids are going to start in a place that's far ahead from where you started.

Rich:

Life Insurance allows you the opportunity to pass something down to your family after you've gone on.

Rich:

Now, I gave you the example of just enough to pay for a funeral. But you can get policies there are millions of dollars. Now those costs more. You're paying hundreds of dollars a month or you know you're paying more than $10 to $15, $20 whatever we said, but at the end of the day if you really want to open up opportunity for your family, life insurance. is a huge way to do that.

Nik:

One thing that I've learned in our quest to build wealth and leave a legacy for our own branch of the family tree is that people have been using, and not necessarily Black folks, right. But people have been using tools and documents like life insurance, trusts, wills, and things like that to help to establish and build wealth in their family for a long time. And this is a little bit different than the way that we've been taught, right? Because a lot of us are taught from a position of lack. Like we're taught money doesn't grow on trees, or we can afford that, and we can't do that. But when we're talking about planning for your family's future and how to leverage these documents, we have to be open minded enough to know, you know what? Money doesn't grow on trees, but there are so many different ways to make money and it's outside, a lot of times, of those traditional ways that we've been taught, or we've seen. So, if we're not open minded enough to even know, hey, I can use my life insurance to help to establish and build wealth for my family the same way that these other people been doing forever.

Rich:

So, I think we've probably beat this dead horse on life insurance. Get some life insurance.

Rich:

But something else that goes I think in line with that is having a final Will and Testament. So, you know, we always just call it a will. But it's called a final Will and Testament. Because there are two types of wills. There's a living will, and then there's the I'm dead will which is called your final Will and Testament. And once again, I have Googled, what does a final Will and Testament cost?

Nik:

How much does it cost?

Rich:

If you do it online, it's only $500. Now, what that means is you're going to fill out all your paperwork, you're going to print it off, and then you're going to have to take it to a notary and get it notarized and you're going to have to have witnesses there. Because my wife and I have actually been witnesses to some friends that needed their will updated and they needed some signatures. And ultimately, just so you know, if you are signing somebody will that means you're not in it. You have to be a disinterested party. But it's important to realize that if you don't have a will and you die, everything you own can get locked up in probate and locked up in court. And it could take forever to actually cash out in a way, right? And even if you have life insurance, it can be an issue, if there's no will, if there's no executor of your will, if there's no one that's taking charge. So, you want to make sure that you are preparing in every aspect for that day that you won't be here to provide for your family in whatever way that looks.

Nik:

I think what we're talking about here really is protection, right? We want not just to protect our family right now, while we're living or while we can, but it's protecting our family in the far, deep future. Like you talked about the deep future a few episodes. ago when we talked about legacy. And this is one way your life insurance, your will and testament, your living will. So, these are things that are protecting your family. And to me protection is one of the ultimate forms of demonstration of love for your family. Your children, your grandchildren, they're going to look to you for certain things. And protecting them is one of those things. And if you are a parent again, sorry to isolate the parents again. But if you're a parent, part of your job is to protect your children. And if you're not thinking about protecting them from the stress that comes from dealing and trying to get your stuff out of probate after you die, are you really protecting them?

Rich:

A lot of times as adults, we always want to focus on the adults. But like I said, don't forget that you have children because they matter. So, if they pass, you have a funeral. So, you need to Make sure you have money to do that. If they don't pass and you do before them, which is you know how most parents would hope that it is. What are your plans for your children? You know, if you have children that are under the age of 18, and you got a bunch of five, and four, and six and three year olds running around your house right now, and you don't have a plan for where they would go, if something were to happen to you, then you are not protecting your children. And we always assume in our community, well, somebody in the family will take them. I'm gonna tell you now, I've said it before, don't never make that assumption about me. Because what if I'm not in a position to take care of your children? You know, what, if someone is not in the position, health-wise or financially to take care of your children? You chose to have them so you should have a plan. And make sure that whoever you believe is going to take care of your children, they actually know that. There should be a conversation about that. It shouldn't just be well, my mom is gonna take them.

Nik:

So, we're coming from the standpoint of people who don't have these things in place. What about the people who do already have these documents in place? I've said it before in 2020 we all know that we should have a will. We all know we should have life insurance. Like these are things that educated Black folks we know we should have in place. And a lot of us do have these documents in place. If you have these documents in place, it's very important to talk to your kids about these documents. Talk to them about what they are, why they're important, and most critically, where they can find these documents in case, they need them. Because a lot of times we'll have these documents in place, but nobody knows where to find them when they need them. And then that in itself can create a whole different type of chaos and, and uncertainty when it comes to the inevitable.

Rich:

And I think that's a great point because so often one person in the household is paying all the bills or they know where all the tax documents and all the DD 214s and life insurance policies, they know where it's all at. But maybe they haven't really shared that with their spouse. And when you have children that are of age, I would say, you know, once they're 14, 15, they're old enough for you to sit down and have these conversations with them. Because once again, you can't think that everything is going to go exactly as you've planned it.

Rich:

I'm going to be 98 when I pass, and my great grandkids are going to be here, and they're all going to be around my bedside. And I'm going to whisper words of wisdom to each person prior to me taking my last breath. That is not how it's always going to be as much as that may be your dream way of going out or however it is. Right?

Rich:

You know, at the beginning this year, Kobe Bryant passed. And I mean, that was huge news. That was big news. It was unexpected. If his wife didn't know where things were, then it doesn't matter if she has a bunch of money. It doesn't matter that her husband was a famous, huge, important basketball player, right? It doesn't matter. She still has to go through the same legal steps as anyone else.

Nik:

Not only share with your kids where these documents are or your spouse, or any interested party who's going to be handling your affairs, once the inevitable does happen. You opened up and said, we're all going to die. I mean, we are all going to die. And we don't like to think about it. But it's true, right? But familiarize yourself with the terminology. Sometimes this stuff can get so complicated with all the legal jargon and everything. But there are certain terms that I believe people should familiarize themselves with and get comfortable with. And not only should you familiarize yourself with it, but your kids and those people who are going to be handling your documents should understand these, these things also. Because when you're gone, you're gone. So, if you're the only person that understands what's going on who, what, when, where, why and how. That's not helpful.

Rich:

And with that, you have to think about is everything on your computer that no one can access but you because it's locked down. Because you know, you just you one of those people. That's gonna prevent your family from being able to move forward. And you have to remember when someone passes, they're already grieving. So, there's already that piece. But now they've also got to worry about how am I going to pay for a funeral? How am I going to take care of the bills that are still due? Just because you die, your bills don't stop. The creditors don't all of a sudden say well, you don't have to pay on the house that you and your spouse are both on. You know, now your individual bills, that's one thing but things that are in both you and your spouse's name, those things don't stop. They transfer over to just her or him. So, if you have this, everything locked down, and no one knows where it is, or if they know where it is, but they can't access it. If you're the only person that knows the code to the safe, the fire safe that you have all your documents in. You're the only person that has a key to the safe and nobody knows where you keep it. Is that really going to benefit your family? You know, it's easy to always think that you'll be there to provide and to answer questions. But the reality is, is you may not be.

Nik:

Thanks, so much for tuning in to this week's episode of the Naked Proverbs. We want you to truly have a happy marriage. We want you to continue to thrive in your marriages and indulge in your spouses on a regular basis. Don't forget to follow the Naked Proverbs on whatever podcasting platform you listen on. And we will talk to y'all in the next one.

Rich:

Peace.

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